Some days I feel like I have this juggling act all figured out.

But most days, I struggle, just barely keeping my balance.

trying not to drop any balls

Somedays I feel like I have way too many balls to juggle:

Ball #1) My kids

(but really, there are like 10 balls under just caring for my kids):

My son's homework, My son's sports, playdates,

school events, meals, baths, etc.

Ball #2) My husband and nurturing our relationship

Ball #3) Business owner:

client care, creativity, organization, shooting, editing photos,

delivering photos, social media (blog, fb, etc.)

Ball #4) Home care- laundry, dishes, grocery shopping, organizing and cleaning

Ball #5) Me- self care~ sadly, this one is the first to go

*****

The ball that gets dropped first- almost daily,

isn't even incorporated in to the juggling act,

is self care.

*****

I feel overwhelmed at times and feel like I can never have a day where I can get it all right.

Recently, I have been giving myself permission to not get it all right-

to have days where I get pieces of each category accomplished.

***

Being a mom is a juggling act in itself, and being a business owner is a juggling act in itself

but combining the 2 and putting housework on top is just insanity sometimes.

 ***

This past week I have felt somewhat defeated.

Possibly because I realize that I was barely pulling off that juggling act as it was,

and now summer is almost here-

the kids are finishing up with school

and I am out of those few precious child-free hours

where I had just a bit of time to get a few tasks done.

~

Back in California where all of our family lives, I could ask for help if I really needed it.

I would know I had help from my parents to help take the kids when I need a break or a breather-

or even just a quick walk to clear my head.

But now that we have moved away from family, I realize more than ever,

I don't have the resources for that quick breather,

where I can just clear my head, feel a little organized.

***

Unfortunately, like a lot of couples,

my husband and I are now trading time to get what needs to be done- done.

but then that separates us.

right now I am missing just us (my husband and I) hanging out, going on walks alone.

I am realizing now that we have moved away from precious family,

that I need to find resources.

I have always had a hard time asking for help,

even from family and close friends.

I know if I don't get organized and find help juggling all of these aspects of my life

eventually it will break me.

I can't do it all- all of the time.

I have examined why it is that I want to be the one to do it all

Why can't I just ask for help?

My husband likes to tease me that I am a control freak,

but in my heart of hearts, the truth is

I just really and truly DEEPLY care.

I care about my business, I care about my kids

PASSIONATELY

and I want to be the one who handles both.

I want it all, to be a very involved mother (working from home)

and to give my kids amazing opportunities.

And to be a very involved business owner,

to have a successful marriage,

to have happy, mindful, and intelligent children and teach them values.

And not to mention to have great friendships and have fun

But

Today, I am feeling overwhelmed.

Buried by responsibility.

But I know I am human.

I'll keep you updated...

*****

Update:

I wrote that on Saturday.

Now it's Tuesday, and I am happy to report in a much better place.

How?

#1) Expressing my feelings to myself and also to my hubby.

Once getting it off my chest, I immediately felt like I could breathe again.

also:

*I journaled.

*I planned alone time with my husband by hiring a babysitter.

*We had great time as a family by doing something different and fun (despite the rainy weekend).

*****

I think its key to be able to identify and honor your feelings,

rather than blaming an outside source-

ask yourself what you are doing and what you could be doing different.

I knew I needed to journal and take time to nurture my own needs and feelings.

I also knew I needed a date with my hubby to nurture us

and although we as a family spend a lot of time together daily,

we needed a little outside family adventure.

PS. I signed my kids up for some AWESOME mini {week long} day camps this summer

{sailing, science, art, tennis, basketball- my 8 year old is so excited, he was jumping up and down!}

I'll get an hour alone of organization- its not much, but its a start!

Here's to a great week!

Question: What do you do to get back on track? How do you stay balanced and happy?

Please share! :)

PPS. My GIVEAWAY for a FREE session is still going on!

Click Here: http://www.wildflowerstudiophoto.com/blog/?p=7182

Thanks for reading! :)

xoxo Shell